freecat15 (freecat15) wrote,

Hello friends!

I haven't been here in a while, and I don't even had a good reason for it. Nothing grave happened.

Well, except - election.
It will probably sound weird, what with me not even being American or at least living in America, but it's really the main reason for my absence.

Brexit had shocked me enough for dreading the outcome of the US election and getting kind of obsessed with everything I could get my hand on the weeks before. I so hadn't expected for Brexit to happen, and the similarities in the way everything developed and in the way I felt about it were too striking not to be scared.

After election night (well, night over here in Germany), that I hadn't slept at all but sat paralyzed in front of my computer, I was in shock for days.
I tried to tell some of my friends in comments to their own shocked posts, but I kind of couldn't express adequately how I felt, especially with not being American, so not as affected as they are. Which, of course, is true, but it doesn't feel that way.

I've been born in 1966 and grew up in the middle of Cold War, spending my whole youth during the coldest times of all. It were really scary times, maybe in Germany even scarier than elsewhere since both parts of our country kind of were pawns in the game, and it was here where the nuclear weapons would've hit first. I wasn't even particularly politically interested back then, but no one didn't care about politics at all - the threat was much too real and much too every-day present. We all went to demonstrations on a regular basis since we were ten (quick comparison to my kids, between ten and 18 years old - not one of them ever was on a demo). The end of the Cold War was a relief that younger people probably can't comprehend.

And now - for the first time since those days I feel fear about the future. And much worse than back then even, and it has a lot to do with Trump being elected. Every decision he made until now, every single calling he announced, every tweet he posts, every word he speaks shows how real the threat this time is. A lot of it concerns the US only, of course. These parts are bad enough, and even if I personally don't have to suffer through this does it make me beyond angry on behalf of all Americans, and especially those on my flist.

But what really scares me is the massive change of America's role in the world that will happen and the dire consequences it will have in all the world. Russia, Middle East, Israel - I fear that is just the beginning, and it would be naive to expect my home country not to be involved in one way or another.

What also really frightens me is the role of the new media in all of this. It's uncontrollable, and the results have never been so obvious as in November. And again - I fear that this was just the beginning. The elections in Germany and France this year will be the next target, in a time when xenophobia is rising here anyway because of the refugee crisis in Europe. Austria has been the only slight gleam of hope last year, but even there it was close.

And add to all of this the attacks happening in the free world - I often don't know anymore what to tell my kids.

So, anyway. Nothing of this is new to all of you. I just felt the need to explain why I haven't been commenting those last few months as I usually do - I'm sorry for that. I was mostly reading NYT online (and others) in my free time (which isn't that much anyway), and I couldn't muster the mood to read or ogle or comment anything fandom related. I completely missed Fag End's Halloween thing, and the very last prompts over there ever (  :(  ), and I missed even a lot of Seasonal Spuffy. I will try to catch up in the next weeks, at least on the shorter stories (no promises, though; I have no idea how much time I will really have.).

On a completely unrelated note (except if you see it like I do as the last effort of 2016 to screw us over...), I created an account with the same name on Dreamwidth yesterday after I read about the concerning news of LJ's server move to Russia. I'm posting from there now, cross posting everything here. Just in case this whole thing here blows up one day, I don't want to lose all my friends. I'll try to find you all there...I think I finally figured out how to friend you there.

And I wish all of you a very happy new year!

Tags: life stuff
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